This children’s book keeps running through my mind:
We’re going on the bear hunt
we’re going to catch a big one
what a beautiful day
we’re not scared.
Oh no a swamp
a swishy wishy swamp
we can’t go over it
we can’t under it
we can’t go around it
we’ve got go through it.
I don’t know if those are the actual words, but they’re close. When the hunters (with cameras of course) finally find the bear, they admit as they run from the cave, that they were afraid all along. Fear is a big thing for us right now, maybe not fear for ourselves, but fear for those we love, fear of no work and no financial support, fear of the future, so many fears it’s hard to count them all.
Maybe the biggest fear of all is that we don’t know what to do because we are not in control of this virus that is infecting the whole world. The world that is a web of interconnectivity, that has tendrils reaching from all countries, all cities to our own supposedly safe back yards. What can we do?
This kind of time reminds us that there is nothing we can do to change things, and also reminds us that we are dust and to dust we shall return. Meditation teaches us that each breath we take is a present breath, a being here now breath, but is also teaches us about death. In the stillness we are doing nothing, being nothing, just still. The ego doesn’t like this state because the ego wants to protect us, to make sure that our physical self is safe in the world. But as meditation also teaches us there is always more, something beyond this physical, biological self.
This something beyond is where our anchor lies. So to may be helpful to learn to sit in the fear and anxiety and be honest with ourselves as to what we’re feeling. We can find someone to share these feelings with, someone to listen to our hearts. It’s Ok to be afraid, give that fear permission to teach you.
On a Spiritual Director’s International webcast one person said to ask ourselves what are we most afraid of and then to ask ourselves is there another way to look at that? Richard Rohr was saying in a recent podcast that Julian of Norwich lived through the plague in Europe in the 12th & 13th century and one of her most famous quotes is: “All shall be well…” When we sit with the fear and anxiety without judging it, can we then begin to watch it from a place of detachment and ask what opportunity are these feelings giving me?
Everyone has different feelings and different opinions right now, and that’s OK, we’re all different, we’ve all had different experiences - may we honor each other. As we go through this bear hunt together, may we slow down and listen to the needs of others and the needs of ourselves. What do I need to do to take care of myself so that I can take care of others? We can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we can’t fly away from it…I guess we might as well go through it - together in love.